I love this! So unlike my work too!
Putting on your makeup
Has been kidnapped by smart phones.
Ransoms are paid monthly,
Don’t worry, it’s done automatically.
The kidnappers will send you alerts
If your eyebrow pencil is in danger.
They will text you a request
To update your personal information
Skin tone, age group, sexual identity, eyeliner.
Make sure to
Add a backup e-mail account
In case you forget your eyeshadow.
Answer all security questions:
- Your mother’s maiden blush
- Maybelline is your father’s middle name
- What was the name of your first pimple?
Type in the right code, if you can.
You are beautiful.
You are not a robot.
All attempts to hack into your face
Have been blocked.